UN-PAUSE

and so, just like that, i passed off the beast. does that mean i'll posting more regularly again? i sure hope so. i took on quite the load this semester and have learnt a lot about myself in the process. i swear i'm partially schizophrenic, or at least socially so. now that pretty much all of my friends are gone i don't go out very often. Kate and i have started having lunch again and i feel like life, in turn, has gained a more positive slope (not that i'm saying life is plots on a graph or anything...)—i have so much to say but i'm afraid my mind would stutter and i would just mess things up. i'm just glad i have great friends. i hangout with Nate and Cole almost every day as we slave over our cs projects. we call ourselves the 'brogrammers.' pretty neat, huh? my mission papers are in as of tuesday night! that's the most exciting thing you missed in my absence. a lot has happened, a lot has changed. i haven't had many opportunities for bursts of creativity. in fact, i feel like i'm at a three on a scale of creativity (out of ten) and i'm stuck there. i need to do something about that really soon or i'll be driven mad. maybe a good batch of movies will help with that. i just need friends to watch them with. that sounds stupid but it's true. the people i want to watch movies with are either gone or preoccupied all of the time. a foreign film would do wonders for me. i started hanging out with Sam, Zach's older sister (man i miss that guy. side note: i need to do something with zach's corner. i've been considering putting his letters over there for everyone to read, but i just haven't made up my mind yet. i'm silly in that way, i can't ever make up my mind on certain things. like naming variables in a fresh program... ugh.) and her roommate Jessi. they are wonderfully awesome people. i have a great time with them. i really have missed telling you guys about everything (all like five of you) i stumble across. i hope that i'll be able to get back to blogging more. i say hope because as the semester winds down to a close i very readily expect my life to become not my life and become some sort of routine trying to solidify my hard work over these past three months with outstanding test scores. this month has been hard for me—lots going on. but i really must say, there are some people in my life that i am particularly grateful for. there have been a few days that i really just wanted sleep through, and oddly enough, it was on those days that i would, with no prior expectation at all, happen to see them. and when i did i would feel awake—not the kind of awake that's the opposite of tired—but the kind of awake that makes you more aware of life and the things you care about. the kind of awake that makes you want to sing instead of speak or run instead of walk. now those people, those people i'd miss any amount of sleep for. it's time to un-pause and press play. it's time to be clay. all day.