Bonjour à tous et à toute!
This will be the first time since August since my readers have
heard from me. For that I'll apologize and say that I have no excuses! A lot
has happened, but I'm not going to try to fill you in here. That might come
later. To bring you up to where you need to be, I'm answering two final
questions from my family. The answers came in spite of the questions, but they
apply all the same.
What miracle have you seen recently?
How is your testimony compared to when you first started your
mission?
I'm not sure where to begin... this week has been a changer for
me. It's opened my eyes to quite a bit thanks to a few really powerful, really
unique testimonies. As you know, we were privileged to have Elder Neil L. Andersen,
Bishop Gerald Caussé, Elder Hallstrom, and Elder Homer come to our mission this
past weekend. The entire mission gathered for a special conference where we
studied the Atonement with them. I'll get to that in a moment...
On Friday night, after mission leadership council, we had a
baptism at our building. Thierry, the man being baptized, had written to Elder
Andersen a few months before and asked if he would baptize him. He couldn't
because that night he was conducting interviews to call the new stake
president. He was, however, able to be a witness to the baptism. There were
about 15 of us in the room with Thierry and when Elder Andersen walked in we
stood. Before he asked us to sit he told us that he would like to bear his
witness of the name of Christ in French. I cannot remember exactly what he
said, but I know exactly how I felt. I now know that Jesus
Christ is a Being as well as a God. He was resurrected and lives to this day at
the right hand of God the Father. He is.
It was a simple testimony, but it was as real as anything I've
ever experienced. I couldn't keep my mind from playing it back in my heart,
over and over throughout the evening.
The next morning we met with all four of the General
Authorities. Elder Caussé spoke about the reasons why he and his wife decided
to accept the call to serve as a general authority years ago. Elder Hallstrom
taught us that when we are "taught from on high" we must "bind
ourselves to act" and if we do we will be blessed. I started contemplating
a few of the binding actions I must make in my own life and I still am. Elder
Homer bore a simple testimony of the truth of the Gospel. And then Elder
Andersen addressed us. Because of the feelings his unique testimony brought
into my heart the night before, I humbled myself knowing that he spoke for
Christ Himself and decided to listen. To really listen. Not
just to hear, but to listen. He spoke of one thing, and one thing only. The
Atonement of Jesus Christ. I wish there were a way to share with you how I felt
and how I feel but I just cannot find the words. Some things you just have to
realize and learn on your own. Sometimes you're forced to be humble, other
times you humble yourself. I haven't really ever allowed myself to stand back
and check my own life before. I've never really voluntarily humbled myself to
true submission to the Atonement. And I want to now.
Sunday morning we were privileged once again to hear from Elder
Andersen and Elder Homer as they addressed us in stake conference after
reorganizing the stake presidency. Our bishop, Bishop Gingras, was called as
the second counselor, Brother Ferland, who I came to know and love in Rimouski,
was called as the first counselor, and President Pirlet, who was the first
counselor, was made stake president. Each of them took their turn bearing
testimony of both small and significant decisions in life that they made as
they turned their lives over to the Lord. Big doors swing on small hinges. I
was in the choir watching and listening from behind, all the while trying to
keep a professional poise, while being pummeled by thoughts and feelings
looking over my own life and finding decisions that I may or may not have made
correctly wondering all the while if I had closed doors that could have been
opened had I made a better decision. And once again I contemplated decisions
that are now within my grasp that could open or close significant doors behind
which may lie still more significant blessings. And then Elder Andersen spoke.
Faith. Diligence. Patience. My faith has taken a sudden turn heavenwards. I
know things now that I didn't quite know before. The funny
thing about knowledge is that the best decision that we can make is determined
by how much we know. And acting correctly based on correct knowledge is called
diligence. It's not always easy, in some cases it may be the absolute hardest
thing that you've ever done. But if you're patient, if you walk without
wavering knowing that the Lord will lead you along, well, at least you can be
assured that you'll always be where He wants and needs you to be. Faith.
Diligence. Patience. Faith. Repentance. Endurance.
One of my favorite questions to ask, and one that produces many
different answers is: What is the gospel? Would you mind trying to
define it?
There are many definitions ranging from simple to complex,
primary to priesthood, but never before have I really understood like I do now.
It's taken 20 years, of which the past 19 months have been dedicated and
consecrated to nothing but the Gospel. And I finally know what it is. I
understand it. Now the funny thing is knowing that my understanding is
incomplete and will continue to grow and change with time and experience and
sheer life. But I'm at a point where I feel confident in my knowledge to make
the best decision that I can. And that is to live it. And
to love what comes of it.
"Life isn't about finding your way between health and
sickness, it's not about riches and rags, social stature and shame. No, life is
about finding your way between the good and the bad." -Elder Neil L.
Andersen
Elder Clay Ellis
